Tales of the Insane

My dog barks every time my roommate comes in the house. It's severely annoying. So I read in some dog training guide that to alleviate barking you can squirt the offender with a water gun when they bark. So today I bought this bad ass, menacing watergun - it's a pastel colored frog. The water comes out in a stream out of the frog's mouth. Tonight I was half asleep and my roommate came into the house, as if on cue the little yipper started yapping. I quickly fumbled for my gat on the dresser and took aim, but it was too dark and I couldn't see. My dog by this time had stopped barking, probably because she was like what is this bitch doing. I suddenly realized the absurdity of my situation. I was wildly aiming a frog gun in the dark trying to take aim at my five pound dog. I am insane.

Dog Day Afternoon

umm yeah. he's so damn cute it almost hurts.








the grumpy, naked Shinto. the other kids were looking at him like dude put some clothes on. but he just scowled back and then snapped his dick at them like a rubber band. then he put on his blue clogs, hopped on his scooter, and was like what now bitches.

then he rolled up to the painting corner and was like give me that damn brush i can paint better than these peasants. move woman with the unusually white calves!



this is Papi. of Papi & Chico.

this is Chico. a very strange child.

he sang these nonsensical children's songs in his thick italian accent. while chico would periodically, in a high pitched nasally voice, yell out "na, na, na, nah, na"


then Papi collapsed on the floor, as if he just played Madison Square Garden. oh he also was wearing these boots with heels and did some type of Spanish flamenco moves, but he's Italian. In any case the french bulldog barked at him when he did it, so he stopped.




summer barbeque, artist compound, brooklyn